Ryan puts on a Spiderman mask, then places a Spiderman glove on Lexi’s left hand.
Ryan: I’m going to fight crime with Lexi.
Lexi: Yeah!
Ryan: We’re a team. She’s gonna fight baby crime and I’m gonna fight big crime.
Funny Things My Kids Say Posts
Crimefighters
Preschooler Packing
Asking a 4 year old what books/toys he wants to bring on a weeklong trip is an exercise in cuteness. He chose a squishy purple ball, a hair curler and a book about the Civil War.
Duh – obviously!
Doo Doot – YUM
I know that the word “yogurt” is not really pronounced “Doo Doot” or even “Go Gut” but I think it would be a good idea if it were….
Our First Grandchild
I have a new photo on my desktop of Ryan hugging his best friend Emma, taken at the park the other day. It’s really cute and actually a pretty rare shot.
By rare, I mean that Ryan is not a hugger.
Well, technically that’s not true.
He hugs the heck out of me and the immediate family. And he always has to give a hug and kiss to people before they leave the house. A hug and kiss on the leg is his standard goodbye with his friends’ Moms (their legs are at his eye level – chill) and I’m pretty sure he’s even tried with the Chinese food delivery guy. But one thing is for certain – it is a rare occasion when he hugs a friend. I don’t know what this means exactly, but something about it makes him feel weird or uncomfortable. Which doesn’t explain why he was just fine doing “belly cheers” (bumping bare bellies) with his friends for close to a year until I bought some books about privacy and inappropriate touching. But hugging? Too personal – or something.
So when he showed this awesome display of huggyness, I saw wedding bells.
Because everyone likes to plan a wedding for their four year old. Duh.
So I asked him if he’s going to marry Emma. He said yes. Then I asked if he’s going to have kids with her. He said yes, eight. Nice! So I asked what he’d like to name the first baby. Only because it’s important to prepare for your future.
He paused, cocked his head to the side and studied the picture of himself hugging his future wife. He traced his finger up and down their arms on the computer screen, seemingly lost in thought. What a touching moment. I was sure he was contemplating a special name for my first grandchild.
“Well, I think Alissyullsee.”
“I’m sorry, what?”
“Mom! You didn’t hear me? I like the name Alissyullsee. Say AL-ISS-YULL-SEE.”
“Alissyullsee.”
Sigh and an eye roll. Obviously I’m slow. Or he detects a foreign accent.
“Mooooommm, how many times do I have to say it? It’s Alice You’ll See. Do you think Emma will like it?”
“Um, sure. But won’t it be difficult to buy anything with her name on it? It’s kinda long.”
“Huh?”
I guess I can wait on the 8 grandkids. Only because Alice You’ll See is a totally crappy name. Ryan surely needs to mature. I’m a little disappointed he’s taking this so lightly.
Anyway, can you imagine the cuteness when we do the video montage on their wedding day? Here are just a few of the gazillions we have of them together…
- First picture together
A Wizard with Words
We started doing workbooks/activity books in addition to reading with Ryan before bed. He always liked workbooks, and I like the idea of him continuing to learn during the summer when the only thing he seems to absorb otherwise is “You’re not my boss” and various other phrases from camp.
The page we were on last night was all about the letter V. There were three pictures – a violin, a vase and something that didn’t start with V. You had to ‘X’ out the one that didn’t begin with V. So I point to the first picture and Ryan says, “Violin. Vvvvvv. Yeah, that begins with V.” Then he looks at the second picture.
“What is it? A bottle?”
“Nope. I’ll give you a hint – you put flowers in it.”
“OH! A vase! Like the Wizard a Vase!”
I love how kids think.
It reminds me of all the ways we mangled song lyrics as kids. I have a friend (who is probably reading this) who thought the chorus in Paul Young’s Every Time You Go Away went, “Every time you go away… you take a piece of meat with you.” Or the chorus of Elton John’s Tiny Dancer, “Hold me closer Tony Danza…”
What were some of your all-time favorite lyrical mess-ups?
That’s not a present
Ryan is watching me wrap Cory’s Birthday present. It’s a bunch of shirts in a box. Exciting, truly.
Ry: “What’s that?”
Me: “Daddy’s Birthday present.”
Ry: “That’s not a present. You’re not telling the truth.”
Me: “What do you mean? He asked me for shirts for his Birthday. He’ll like this.”
Ry: “No he won’t! A present is something like a machine that moves and makes noise!”
Daddy Issues
Cory had just finished playing a game with Ryan and started putting his pajamas on. I was hanging Ryan’s clean laundry in the closet.
“Daddy, I like Mommy better than you because she plays with me more and stays home with me.”
Mind you, neither of us was shocked, as Ryan had been saying things like this for weeks. He even said this particular sentence to Cory last night when they were alone during bedtime and I was out with some friends.
The truth is that as Ryan has become increasingly aware about his immediate world and how it works, he has become increasingly angry with Cory. Although he is surely entitled to his feelings, we wish he would understand more fully why Daddy goes to work, why he sometimes isn’t home for bedtime due to a work dinner or travel but that he has the most involved and wonderful Daddy that a kid could wish for.
And he knows it. As angry as he is with Cory, he is also becoming more attached to him. He sometimes asks how many days until the weekend so that he can have “lots of Daddy time” and he is proud to have the Daddy that plays Monster/Tag/Water Balloons with him and his friends at parties while the rest of us just want to sit and relax.
Cory felt so guilty earlier this month when Ryan kept asking about the weekend that he changed a Saturday overnight in Atlantic City with friends before a Sunday baseball game to a day trip so that he could spend the day with Ryan. He took Ryan to the batting cage that day…
I understand why Cory feels guilty, although I hate it because it’s undeserved. And I know that he’s only four, but I wish Ryan understood how lucky he is to have a really involved Dad.
Meanwhile, Alexa makes up for (some) of it by shrieking her head off when Cory comes home, practically sprinting to the door and smacking his face with sloppy kisses as she’s scooped into his arms.
Now that I think of it, maybe we shouldn’t focus on Ryan so much. He’ll understand eventually, but a little girl with Daddy issues could make me a Grandma at 45.
Off to talk to Cory about holding off on work dinners for the next 5 years…
Animal Noises
My internet has been down for 4 days. Although I missed you, it has been a nice break.
Just a quickie – Head of State with Chris Rock is on while we’re folding laundry and Ryan suddenly yells, “Hey! That guy sounds like the zebra from Madagascar!”
I’m sorry, he’s a genius. Or he watches too many movies. Whatever.
(New post coming soon.)
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Little story from this morning: Head of State with Chris Rock is on and Ryan looks up from his game and says, “Hey that guy sounds like the zebra in Madagascar!” Freaking genius.
